Now and then there are comments on the most strange stuff.
On second languages. Mark:
I speak two languages, English and Bad English!
The discussion of open or hidden
character sheets (There is also a poem):
Madeleine: "Folly pulls on her boots--" "Are you
sure she ought to do something that tricky, with her Fire score?
Mightn't she be wiser to get Jerod to put her boots on for her?"
John: Don't be silly! Jerod would look ridiculous in Folly's
boots...
To much television is not healthy; The
GM (Michael):
Same plot as every week. "We almost got back from the Amber
Quadrant, but
Lucas screwed it all up again, Captain Caineway!"
Seems there is a huge difference in what
happens in the different parts of the universe
Blake, Amberside:
Right now, a little blood and guts might be just the ticket for a
couple of people...:)
John, Chaosside:
You can have some of ours.
We have a surplus.
On titles, Rikibeth:
I think it goes "Once a Prince, always a Prince"
except for the one who later gets to be king. And yes, naturally,
once a Knight is enough.
You shalt not insult your players
GM (Ginger): As part of the cleanup from the long holiday
haul, your friendly neighborhood GMs would like to be sure no one
has any outstanding questions.
Madeline: Hey, ALL of my questions are outstanding. You think I
would offer you guys cut-rate, shabby, anemic questions?! Never!
From the discussion on which winter
sports the PCs would compete in. Poor Vere.
Karen: And I nominate Vere for the 100-meter Freestyle
Ponder.
Olof: Curling. Definitely curling.
Karen: > HAHAHAHAHA!!!! Yes! Or, even better, Vere should be
the color commentary guy for curling:
"Well, Bob, I've performed an extensive analysis of the
films of curling matches past. My research indicates that
sweepers who hold their brooms angled seven degrees away from the
trajectory of the stone are almost four percent more likely to
bring home the gold than are those who use a more parallel
orientation. Fascinating stuff, really."
Lurker request...
My name is Thomas Ricks. I'm 30. I live in Atlanta. I don't see
dead people unless they're actual dead bodies. I make no claim to
super powers, royalty or unusual collection habits
A diagnosis. Cure known
Steve: Adonis isn't used to feeling tired, certainly not
on a chronic basis -must be the lack of sex.
Karen wrote the climate entry in the
encyclopedia
"Thus we see that writing Encyclopedia entries is
equivalent to wielding the Jewel of Judgement. "
Green role-playing
GM (Michael): Last night's massive GM reply-set was much
fun. We are concerned that we're running the game over listed
tolerances on quantity of messages. We do not want to sacrifice
quality or have vital bits lost in a crowd of smaller bits. We
invoke the buzz-word 'sustainable [character] development'.
On nuts and trees
and...
Jovian: "I can't help but wonder how difficult one
child of Daeon's would be to raise, never mind two at once,"
he deadpans. "Assuming the nut doesn't fall far from the
tree."
Steve: Very appropriate to subject - I hope Daeon gets to explain
his view of fatherhood one day.
Madeline: Um... Steve, you realize that in America, "nut"
is slang for "crazy person"...?
Karen: As well as for "testicle". And in non-slang,
it's also something you screw into.
Oh, it works on so many levels.... :)
Uncovering secrets for dummies
Madeline: Ok, this has come up several times in my
experience, at least, and I've been wondering: How do you think
we should go about uncovering secrets? That is, what methodology
do you have in mind?
Karen:I recommend covering yourself with honey and sitting on the
Secret Hive and waiting for one to bite you on the ass.
That's what I do, anyway.... ;)
Treemendous
Meera: It is almost sunset by the time everyone has
debarked from their carriages...
"Darn it, Julian, can't you keep at least half of Arden out
of these things? Woodn't you know it, this stems from a deep
dissatisfaction with the current regime, I bet. I'll get to the
root of our problems, I just don't want to branch out too far. I
bough to your wishes, so just leaf it alone before I twig out!"
Madeline: Better send some burly men to stop this before it
sprouts into something even more tremendous.
Meera: Cyst and deseeds? I mean... [heh]
Madeline: Well, likely the rest are bolled over by our gall, and
such a course would be poplar.
Meera: Why, that's elmentary, if it's Oak-K with you. Lest I
leave you in a larch, I cotton (or wood) to more unless one's
stumped.
Madeline: Oh, I'm having a holly time with it, and I walnut stop
fir quite awhile. If we keep this up for ten more days, we can
celebrate the cedar.
GM (Ginger): [leaving all intact so you two can continue to flirt
...]
Madeline :See, Meera? I told yew this was becoming a thorn in
their sides; and here she's decided to pecan us, it's just a thin
plane away from drawing a lime in the sandalwood.
Add this to Folly's titles
Leslie: However, knowing that Robin was with the
diplomatically trained Conner and Folly, Amber's mood ring, if
she'd been snarling or drinking herself under the table or
staring off into space forlornly, the thread would have gone
really, really differently
On the prospect of a Marius/Ossian/Robin
cabal
Leslie: I ain't gonna say it's impossible 'cause I can't tell the
future, but man -- the thought of those three together. It'd be
like the Amateur Redhead Hour -- 'cept no one's a redhead. With
the possible exception of Ossian. ;)
Madeline: So with all three of them a few fries short of a Happy
Meal, if they got together there'd certainly be enough fries for
at least two Happy Meals. I suppose they could share, like the
Graiae.
The story of Corwin and Morgenstern
Karen: Oh, and Random's 5'6", fwiw. But his driver's
license says 5'8". ;)
Michael Hey, the shadows lie for me. What's so wrong about that.
:)
Ginger: That's not where Corwin had the shadows give him two
extra inches. ;)
Michael:
So Morgenstern walks into a bar and Corwin leans over to Dierdre
and says "I bet I can make Julian's horse laugh and then cry
in the space of 2 minutes."
"No way!," says the princess, slamming back her
Jaegermeister. "This I've got to see," says Random.
"Watch this..." Corwin says, walking over and
whispering something in the left ear of the giant grey steed.
Morgenstern, snorts, whinnies, and laughs and laughs. He almost,
but does not quite fall over. Corwin looks back at the table and
nods once.
Then he goes around to the far side of Morgenstern, pulls the
horse's head down, and whispers something even briefer in the ear
of Julian's creation. Sure enough Morgenstern breaks out crying,
hangs his head and shuffles dispiritedly off.
"You win, " says Dierdre, "what did you tell him?"
"Well, first off, I told him that my c**k was bigger than
his."
"Right," says Random, "that would explain the
laughing. And then."
"I showed him," says Corwin, smugly.
Random philosophically drinks his beer and then says "Man,
if he ever figures out that you've been 'making the shadows lie
for you', he's gonna be pissed..."
I guess this is true for most of us
Meera: Works for me and my latent exhibitionism.
Jenn: LATENT?
GM (Ginger): She misspelled "blatant", dear.
Well, the nerdiness
is abundant
GM (Michael): B - Force! Lilly, Jove, Keeopodoahue,
Brennan, Marius and watching over them from Centre Uxmal their
Choaticized co-ordinator 7-Aisling-7! Watching, warning against
surprise attacks by Chaosian galaxies beyond shadow! Fearless
young bastards, protecting Amber's entire shadow-sphere. Always
five acting as one....Dedicated, Inseparable, Invincible!
"Princess" Lilly (Voice of Janet Reno) also known as
"Code Name:Tiger" is the team swordswoman and royal
bodyguard. In Episode 1 (Puck Off!), she stabs and almost kills
Keeopodoahue, leaving him with a speech impediment and the
conviction that he is actually Horus.
"Tiny" Jovian (voice of Alan Thicke) is named for the
300 ton growth that sometimes attaches to his head or his butt.
"Tiny" is the pilot and official timekeeper of the B-Force.
In Episode 2 (Never Whittle While You're Pissing), it is revealed
that he is Keeopodoahue's brother.
"Jase" Marius (voice of Randall Carter) also known as
"the Bishonen Knife". Marius is the team's projectile
weapons and vomiting expert. Due to contract disputes between
CLAMP and Carter, Marius spent all of episodes 6-11 face down in
an alcoholic stupor.
"Commander" Brennan (voice of Casey Kasem) also known
as "First Target" and "Easy Mark". Brennan is
officially responsible for getting yelled at by the King if any
of the team screws up. In episodes 1, 3, 5-22, 24 and the entire
third season, he schemed to kill Keeopodoahue and hide his body
in order to avoid further beratings for Keeopodoahue's hijinks.
Brennan is in Love with Tiger Lilly because of her mishap with
Keeopodoahue.
Keeopodoahue (voice of Kenny Baker) does not speak following the
near tragic botched accidental circumcision by "Princess"
which cost him much of his mind and reduced his voice to chirps
and whistles. Every third episode is dedicated to Keeopodoahue
screwing up very badly and preventing the Phoenix from returning
to the Amber Quadrant, but doing so for lovable, humanitarian
reasons. Commander Brennan has been known to comment that this is
especially generous because it is unclear if Keeopodoahue is
actually human.
7-Aisling-7 (voice of Mel Blanc) from the distant Centre Uxmal (sometimes
known as "the satellite of inappropriate love")
coordinates the activities of the B-Force in the (seemingly)
neverending crusade against Dara and the International Fashion
Police.
Dara, on seeing the B-Force:"... And your King dresses you
funny" (Episode 51: Giant Chaos Bat )
On the naming of children
Madeline: Well, the source of Random's name doesn't really take a
stretch:
Paulette, wheedling: "C'mon, honey, let's name our son like
your people do... None of your others are, really, and it would
be a nice gesture to show we care..."
Oberon: "Screw the people. Am I going to let any offspring
of mine run around with a name that people take into their lips
in trivial, unrelated conversations?! Names have power, woman!
Besides, we're among the people, not of them!"
Paulette, putting her foot down: "Well, I think we should
name this baby in the manner of Amber. Pick an Amber name for
your child."
Oberon: "But they're so /stupid/! Any random word will do...
I'll show you...!"
Too many of those among the players
Blake: This is where we get one of the other resident
scientist types to step into the conversation.
Mark wasn't ISPessially pleased
Mark: Stupid SBC. Stupid Yahoo. Wouldn't feel so smart
with Horn of Gondor shoved right up their--
Research results from Olof
With all these cousins we have some statistics on how to enter the castle
Preferable ways:
Being fetched by the unicorn
Coming in the company of a giant berserkeress. (You can even claim to be older
than dirt and the son of a forgotten uncle. Like anyone dares to protest...)
Being said giant berserkeress.
Entering as a warhero (this might be negated if you are also a known chaosian
spy)
Being brought by Prince Merlin (although if you are from Rebma you should
consider not arriving a few days before a Rebman spy ring is uncovered.)
Being fetched by Prince Martin (Although Vialle might be pissed off when she
finds out you have very much the same taste in men as she)
Maybe not an ideal way of entry:
Bringing news from Rebma that while you have found a way to at least get from
there, you have also possibly botched the diplomatic relationship. And maybe you
are a lying bastard too. (No offense intended)
Not so hot either:
Asking for your favourite uncle, when he happens to be trying to redraw the
universe.
Definitely not recommended:
Bringing your friend the chaosian psychobitch, so she can throw playing cards at
people. And then help her escape too.
This page was updated 20 mar 2005.